Eleven Bells: [Action/Written] Oddly Introverted Today

[simplestgift]

[Tonight, Archie is out in the woods, walking along the river instead of the path toward the southern lake. Something about being away from the village, in the solitude of the woods, with the sky going on for miles above him, is closer than anything else to the openness of the sea. The strange thing is that Archie was never too poetic about the sea itself--it was the ships he loved, not the water they sailed on. But now that the sea is far away and there is no ship to sail upon it, he finds himself very homesick for that endless expanse. So he walks by moonlight, gathering his thoughts and finding as much tranquility as he can in the woods.

When he returns home through the village, it will be past midnight. He'll stare at the furnished, unlived-in bedroom in his apartment, set up for someone who never comes. In the morning, he'll wake up on the couch, beneath the mural of the Indefatigable. Eventually, he'll write an unsigned message on the journal network.]

When the wind embraces all the world between the sky and sea,
It speaks in my ear of the left-behind, dear friend, it speaks of thee.
I wish you a journey far and long and spirits high and free,
And hope that the wind still speaks to you, dear friend, and speaks of me.

[A few minutes later, he'll scribble the whole thing out.

In the morning, anyone will be able to find him about, grocery shopping mostly, but also just browsing the shelves idly.  He'll hit Good Spirits a little earlier than usual and drink a little more than normal.]

Comments

[ written ]

[simplestgift]

[He considers his reply. She'd just confided some pretty heavy things, so he'd better not make light of the situation. Revealing himself, however, might make her clam up again, and he likes this honest conversation.]

You blame yourself because you can't rescue your friends from this place. Perhaps they'd rather not be rescued if it would mean leaving you here alone.

[There's some hesitation before he writes,]

Someone who can understand their point of view.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

[ she at least takes the time to work out some kind of a filter. it isn't fantastic, but it'll do. this is hitting upon dangerous territory for so public a discussion. ]

Sometimes, people need to learn that...when you make those choices to protect them? You can't just take back the consequences.

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

It's true.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

[ her writing gets a little less composed -- messier, even. though it was a little messy to begin with. ] And there's a kind of satisfaction knowing you've left them safe and...and better. Even if you can't be with them.

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

[It is a long, long time before he can respond to that one.]

Yes.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

Ergo -- if I'm the leader? They have to accept my choices. And sometimes I choose to [ sacrifice is scribbled out. ] make the unpopular choice.

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

Are you only their leader, then? Not their friend?

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

The friend part makes it extra important. A leader you can haul back and they have to lead and you shouldn't have to care about where they were.

A friend? It's -- [ no, she breaks off. this isn't what she wants to talk about at all. ] It's different.

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

As one who has been on both ends, I advise you not to assume you disappoint them.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

As of two days ago I've been here for two years. That's a long time to become someone else.

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

It is.

I was in exile for two years once. By the time I returned, I wasn't of use to anyone. I thought certain sure everyone was sick of me.

[Actually, it was prison, but that's a kind of exile, right? Especially when it's in another country and the worst thing you did was wake up adrift in a jolly boat.]

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

But they weren't, were they?

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

They were very patient, kind, and respectful of what I had endured. It only took us readjusting to each other again.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

When I came back from -- [ she pauses, takes on his word: ] exile? I couldn't tell them where I'd been.

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

While I couldn't hide it.

Perhaps the details are different, but they'll find some way of understanding. That is all I am saying.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

They have. Years ago. Just -- that's what makes it harder to do it again.

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

It doesn't get easier each time. But you know it can be done. You can't always think of the end result, though. You have to think instead of the next step, in front of you. What's for dinner, and who you'd like to share it with.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

Today? I know the answer to one of those questions. That's a good start.

[ and it leaves her feeling a little more peaceful. ]

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

It's an excellent start.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

And now? It's just a case of making sure the who wants to have supper with me, too.

[ because all jack's doing is swimming back and forth between the shore and his boat. sometimes, buffy might as well not be out here. ]

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

I'm sure he will. [It doesn't take a lot to guess who she's talking about.]

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

I never said the who was a he.

[ ...which makes her suspicious once more. ]

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

Lucky guess.

[ written; private ]

[herotypical]

[ and because it's private, now: ] Look -- do you know who I am? [ since the who are you version didn't go down so well. ]

[ written; private ]

[simplestgift]

[He would like it if she didn't know his identity, but he doesn't want to scare her.]

I've a very good guess. If I'm right, there aren't many in the village who don't know you.