I'm trying very hard, Archie. You have to know that much. Every day I wake up and I put myself to work at being a little more happy for the both of you. Every day.

[ she doesn't want to be the thorn in their happiness. she doesn't feel good about her reservations. she doesn't even feel particularly vindicated. just very sad and very guilty and it didn't even help when jack had tried to reassure her that she didn't have to be happy.

the worst part was the disservice she felt she was doing liz. a bride should be able to trust her maid of honour and buffy could go through the motions as though the world depended on it but -- as with so many parts of her life -- her heart was just a beat out of sync with the rest of the world. ]

I don't like being the villain.